I think Pluggers might just be trolling me now

But SRSLY folks, Pluggers is still a thing. I read the Star Tribune at work to poach the leftover NYT crossword because I think it's just a better paper than the Pioneer Press,* but has more I'm interested in than the actual NYT because I don't take in a lot of NYC theater and also has advice columns. Unfortunately, that also means no daily Pluggers. Once in a while though, sometimes inspired by Sr. Comics Curmudgeon, I remember that it exists and revel in its terriblosity:

Mr. Plugger can't stop eating the canned shrimp cocktail, you guys! Also, the sample lady's hair is so perfect. She is about 60 years old, middle-class and fashionable and white (if dog/bear ladies can be raced) and thought she'd be able to retire in style like her parents did back in the 1980s and never have to work a shitty service job like this again.. HAHA NICE TRY, BABY BOOMER PLUGGER. We all know what you've done to us.

Your hairstylist at Great Clips (no T no shade, that's where I go) is probably roughly 24 years old and first of all was not even alive when the Hamill haircut was a thing. Also, it's time to move on, lady. WAY PAST TIME. Maybe you could update that shit by getting the Rachel or something.**

Because of prescription drug abuse, which we've been over.

Pluggers will all die soon (thank god). But in the meantime, they have MAJESTIC mustaches.

Pluggers acknowledge energy drinks!! If there is some sort of obscure ex-president reference in this panel also, this blog will officially explode. THE END.

*Sorry, St. Paul, we definitely lose this one.
**By the way, I hate myself for making a Friends reference. Feel free to mock me until the end of time.