Mini Lincoln Review and Other Post-Holiday Ramblings

Guys, Thanksgiving was vaguely exhausting since my in-laws were in town. We went to a lot of (thrift/surplus) stores and also restaurants and a movie but we are poor and only so many comments about our poverty can be ignored before I just STFU and put it on the credit card. Note to parents of adult children: your poor kids aren't just whining (probably), they are actually poor. Please buy them Thanksgiving dinner. Also, note to dudes: if you are an adult, you should not comment on the hotness of teenage girls, especially if they are your daughter's friend. Even if you're all adults now. It's creepy as fuck. NOT THAT I AM REFERRING TO ANYTHING SPECIFIC. Also, white people, here's another pro tip: do not mention an ethnic group with a high concentration of population in a particular area and then ask, "What are they like?" This is not cool. If it were to happen in real life, that is, because I am totally being hypothetical and shit. Also: we apparently live in a sod-roofed hut on the prairie now, because I found bugs in our flour and had to take  yet another trip to the grocery store the day before Thanksgiving so I could buy all new flour and sugar and whatnot to make pie crust.

I know you are tired, Abe. Come here and I will snuggle your pain away.

We went to see Lincoln this weekend. And I really liked it. OBVS. You know how much I'm into gangly beardy dudes and also presidents and well, Lincoln in general. My second choice for baby boy name (the first one is secret, unless you know me, and then I may have drunkenly talked about it when mentioning how I want babies but I'm poor, so being drunk all the time is just more cost-effective) is Abraham. I would dress up my little Abe in overalls (little boys in overalls are the cutest thing since baby goats head-butting puppies) and maybe sometimes in little three-piece suits and a top hat. BECAUSE WHY NOT. Though I do realize a real baby would just immediately throw up all over the fake beard I've lovingly crafted out of his father's lustrous beard castoffs. But about the movie: it's mostly about passing the Thirteenth Amendment through the House of Representatives, so it was a bit like an old-timey West Wing episode. But then it got Spielberg-y cheesy sometimes and was all "St. Abe" and maybe a little too self-aware at times. But Daniel Day-Lewis is hot and Lincoln was hot, so two-in-one hotness there. SO GOOD. He should win all the Oscars. Also, smarmy, smarmy, James Spader was so, so good as a sleazy vote-buyer. Also, the mid-to-late 1800s were a prime era for amazing facial hair of all types, so that's something else to love about Lincoln.

UPDATE: I've been waiting for Ta-Nehisi to review Lincoln. Here's his first (of what I'm sure will be many and smart) thoughts.