Tuesday, January 20, 2009

It is possible my neighbor is having some sort of hysterical breakdown

My neighbor Jesus AKA Karaoke Jesus AKA the one who is really loud and can't sing, is fucking crazy. Seriously. I'm pretty sure she's watching TV right now (alone), but she has been giggling guffawing for HOURS ON END. Seriously, every thirty seconds or so. Really heartily. Now, I've seen some funny shows, and I've also been high. The only way her laughing is justifiable is if she just ate a couple really potent special brownies and is watching a marathon of all the best episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm, The Office, Daria, Dr. Katz, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and CSI: Miami* in a row. Now, she's always been loud and always been a singer. This is not new. HOWEVER, the other night, she and some loud male friends rolled in around 3:00 a.m. or so. Isaac and I were just on some drunken Six Feet Under kick, so we didn't really mind. Until those drunk kids were STILL having the loudest conversation EVER and listening to loud, shitty, shitty music at 5:00. I swear to god I was about to go to bed, having just brushed my teeth and considering the couch since it is slightly quieter in the living room than in the bedroom, and Jesus is blasting "Slave 4 U." This is not a joke. Also, some of my other neighbors, who are usually quiet unless they are playing a highly competitive video game, have taken to playing loud, loud music at around 10:00 in the morning. On the WEEKEND. They started this during break, and I just don't understand. For the love christ, could you not turn down your subwoofer a little before noon?! Who ARE these people? Fucking crazy neighbors. *Technically not a comedy. But the Sexy Gay Jesus knows the highly-stylized color filters, snappy music, and crazy high-tech editing techniques are just the shiny veneer that covers David Caruso's (unconvincingly) gruff voice and badass, hilarious one-liners.

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