Energy Drink Review: Rockstar Organic

Whatever.

Supposedly Rockstar is now making an "organic" energy drink. I mean, not supposedly, I've got one right here, I am supposing about the "organic" part. However, I have never, ever cared about my consumption of chemicals, so whatevs. I mean, at least I don't live in this Kazakh village where people keep hallucinating and like falling asleep for five days for no discernible reason. (Note to self: maybe you have a sleeping disease?) It's just a new flavor to me. "Island fruit flavor" with organic cane sugar and "organic caffeine from organic green coffee beans." Okay, player. Let's give this shit a go. I've got improv practice and then later a show and I'm still mourning my Troika loss from the other night, so this shit better work.

FLAVOR: I have no idea how to describe what this tastes like. I mean, not much, I guess. It smells kind of "island fruit"-y. Isaac tasted it and says, "It tastes like carbonation... like a vaguely fruity Sprite." There's a bit of an plant-y edge, maybe that's the green coffee bean thing. We'll see how this goes. The flavor never gets better, but it's so un-flavor-y, that you can drink it pretty fast, at least.

EFFECTIVENESS: Guys, it worked real good. Did a bunch of silly kitchen improv and am still feeling pretty good. It works just as well as a regular Rockstar, I guess.

OVERALL: Recommended if you like things that don't quite taste like anything.