Energy Drink Review: Super Lion

I am married to the World's Greatest Bearded Morbid Nerd. My WGBMN brings me random presents sometimes. Like Malaysian energy drinks! Don't worry, it's halal. There doesn't appear to be any caffeine in here, but the nutrition facts list something called Energy/Tenaga. Oh wait, it's just a bilingual nutrition chart. I have no idea what makes up the alleged tenaga Never mind. Let's just try this little baby can. If I feel anything like the majestic lion on the can, I promise to poorly photoshop something ridiculous.

SUPER! (Not really)

FLAVOR: Okay, it's not carbonated, which is kind of weird. First sip: it's very, very sweet. It tastes like gummy candy kind of and is a little bit thick (maybe because of the lack of carbonation). Interesting. It's just kind of really sweet. Not sickly (yet, luckily it's only 8.5 ounces), but mainly if asked to describe the Super Lion, I would say it is sweet.

EFFECTIVENESS: A listed ingredient is nicotinamide, which I was really hoping basically made this drink a cigarette and gummy worm smoothie, but apparently it's a fancy B vitamin or something that may be used to treat anxiety and possibly acne? Hopefully after drinking this I'll be less anxious and have smooth, clear skin.* I think I feel a bit more energetic, but I did get pretty drunk last night and send some drunk messages and talk about riding my bike to the 24-hour grocery store but then just made a frozen PF Chang's dinner and some rice in my own kitchen in the middle of the night, so getting up this morning/afternoon was a bit of a struggle.

There is some ox bile in here, so I do think it is doing something for me, but at 8.5 ounces, it's almost useless. It's like having only two or three glasses of champagne for me. Nothing. However, it is so sweet, that any larger amount would get pretty gross. Despite its claims to "new super power," I am afraid I'm not inspired to make any terrible pictures in MSPaint.

NOT RECOMMENDED, unless you're just into Malaysian stuff.


*My skin is largely smooth and clear to begin with. Except my chin. A constant problem area.