Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Energy Drink Review: Liquid Ice

An adult human woman poses with a small energy drink can between her large breasts. Source.
Liquid Ice, a li'l 8.3-oz. can of energy, is another of my Jonzy's of Wisconsin acquisitions. This claims to be a "high performance drink." WE'LL SEE. It also claims to be the "ULTIMATE MIXER." Again, we'll see except for that I have no booze on me because I am at work and also it is the morning.

FLAVOR: The drink itself is blue like the can and tastes like, well, Pixie Sticks or Sweet Tarts or something. A Good Flavor, if you like chemicals and candy. It does not taste like "liquid ice," which would just be water. I do think this energy drink would make an excellent mixer. Maybe I should go back to the website and buy four cases get one free because I've given up on pretending I'm not trying to slowly kill myself with caffeine and vodka.

EFFECTIVENESS: It's a tiny half-size can, so I have no significant expectations, but general tiredness (GENERAL TIREDNESS SALUTE) perhaps can be staved off briefly. Something called CoQ-10 supposedly "promotes healthy metabolic fuel efficiency within the cells." WHATEVER YOU SAY, DR. SCIENCE! Also, CoQ-10 sounds like the chemical that gave Alex Mack her special powers. BTWs, tried to watch a few episodes of that show recently because I used to love it so much and it was not very watchable. I used to dress just like her with the oversized boys' striped t-shirts in the mid-'90s, though. Pretty sweet look circa sixth grade. I finished the can and I have perked up just fine, but I fear it won't last long because of the low volume of beverage.

OVERALL: Pretty good. Would like in 16-oz. version. Recommended.

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