Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Shockingly, Adam Lambert is not a feminist icon

He and Kate with all the babies have the same hairdresser: y/y?
The interwebz tell me that some pretty shiny guy from American Idol or whatever said some shit to a magazine:
To some people, me being sexual is really offensive because I’m gay. They’re like, ‘He’s being really gay.’ And I’m like, actually, ‘No, I’m just being sexual.’ Male sexuality is frightening to America [but] female sexuality is all over the place.
FALSE. There are multiple things going on here. Let me attempt to list them in a short, numeric manner: 1. "Female sexuality" is not everywhere. "Dudes's idea of what they want female sexiness to be so they can consume it is everywhere." Using pictures of naked ladies to sell everything from underwear to toothpaste to children's Tylenol is NOT a stand-in for actual female desires. MMMkay? 2. What's "frightening" is female sexuality in general because it upends traditional narratives of female passivity/essential asexuality (except for WHORES). So don't be trying to pretend you don't benefit from male privilege by being allowed to express an assertive sexuality at all. 3. What people fear from YOU, Adam Lambert, is the desiring of the male body. It undermines our ideals about masculinity, dominance, and heteronormativity as propped up by this dominance. Boys FUCK, they are not to BE FUCKED. Duh. 4. Also, you like sparkly shit and that messes with people's gender stereotypes. Which, ya know, is not the same thing as SEXUALITY, though it may or may not be closely tied to it, not that anyone besides me and a few select others really gives a shit about such definitions and/or debates. WHY DOES NOT EVERYONE HAVE TO TAKE A REQUIRED COURSE IN HIGH SCHOOL ON FEMINIST AND QUEER THEORY THAT TEACHES PEOPLE HEALTHY SEXUALITY AND BREAKS DOWN GENDER BINARIES AND GOOD GOD I WILL HAVE TO HOME-SCHOOL MY POOR CHILDREN WHO WILL ALREADY BE ALL SKINNY AND TOO SMART FOR THEIR OWN GOOD AND AWKWARD AND NEUROTIC BUT HOPEFULLY AT LEAST BEARDED LIKE MY MAN. So apologeez, future babies: but I have found counseling to be very helpful at certain critical junctures of my life. So what I am saying is that while I agree that there are some serious issues of homophobia in the world and in the media and whatnot, I think Adam Lambert is pretty uninformed about what constitutes representations of "sexuality" and/or sexual objectification in the public eye. That is all. Stupid Adam Lambert: GO TO COLLEGE (and take a gender studies class). Via Just Jared (linked above) and Jezebel, of course. P.S.: WANDA SYKES CAN DO NO WRONG. Although I am skeptical of her male sidekick on her new show, which I-Man and I watched on Saturday night because we love her. However, it was only episode 2, and I hope Fox gives her enough time to settle into a consistent (and no doubt AWESOME) tone.

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