Sunday, July 29, 2012

Sad, sad skip this post because whining

Oh guys, it's kinda hard to know what to say on this blog when all I want to say is "I'm so depressed, guys!" No one wants to hear that shit. It's not interesting. I'm already on what I consider my high(er/est) dosage of Prozac, and since I'm all unemployed and trying to embark on a new phase of my life, it's kind of understandable that I might have 93750938 emotional breakdowns every day and have to force myself to even go outside. But that doesn't mean that this over-achieving unique snowflake doesn't still feel bad about it!

Look at my non-existent dissertation: I've had -2 meetings about it, and nothing is happening because I won't read my shit from the library or email other faculty members and also work is hard and also is this really what I want to devote the next few years to?

Look at my non-existent writing/creative career: I feel pretty good about producing one preview video, but creativity is even harder than schoolwork often and also I am sad.

So what I am saying is that in all honesty, Sr. Depressington (not to be racist) followed me to Minnesota, and people saying they were "impressed by [my] credentials" really doesn't help me feel better about being so, so unemployed. Good job on getting two jobs, husband. I should probably just sleep forever or something. God, I hate everything.

1 comment:

  1. I skipped this post like you asked so I'm also not leaving a comment. I didn't have it nearly as bad, but when we moved to BG my stress was high enough that I ended up in the hospital for weird physical symptoms and one of the meds they gave me pushed me over the edge. For a few days all I could do was focus all my energy on not crying, I couldn't think straight at all. Just want to say lots of others understand and empathize with what you're going through and wish you the best. I'm sure it doesn't feel like it now, but it can and will get better. You can feel free to delete this comment if you like, since I never read the post like you asked. ;)