Energy Drink Review: Rockstar Super Sours Green Apple

My prediction is that this will be kinda gross like the other Super Sour flavor, but I'm just going to make sure. FOR SCIENCE. And for you, dear readers. It's all for you. Here goes my take on this Super Sour Green Apple concoction:

FLAVOR: It is green apple "with other 'natural' flavors" [dick fingers added]. It's definitely green apple-y! A little intense, but not bad. I like to drink the occasional hard cider bev, and this does not taste too different. I would not say "super" sour, just, like, the flavor of green apples. Even as it warmed up, it still tasted pretty good. I think I like this one.

EFFECTIVENESS: It is pretty good. I'm definitely feeling up a bit. I really got to cut back on my at-home caffeine intake, though, because otherwise I'm going to have to drink like three energy drinks a day to just stay awake at my desk, and I will probably give myself a heart attack before age 30 (four more months!).

Update: the caffeination level still seems pretty good. I am definitely more wakeful now, but still unmotivated to edit a cover letter that's due today or to write about anything besides energy drinks or to not hate other people simply for existing near me. It always cracks me up that Rockstar says its products are "designed for those who lead active lifestyles." HAHAHAHA. Active! I am actively awesome, but that's about it. I do most of my awesoming from a desk or a couch or on my living room floor doing some weird LSD-inspired fairy jigsaw puzzle I bought at the Goodwill.

Overall: RECOMMENDED.