|It's the red one.|
EFFECTIVENESS: I've had about 38% of the drink so far, and I can already feel it. It's making me feel like a super-basic coding cheetah (MSPaint image possibly forthcoming, let's so how I feel here in a bit). Turns out I'm too lazy, but the energy boost was a-OK and whatnot. I've lost interest in writing anymore about this now.
Here, go take this charming and silly Halloween quiz from Kate Beaton. You're welcome.